3 Things No One Will Tell You About Buying an Engagement Ring
Because it’s kind of a big deal
In the bridal business, people spend tons of time talking romance. To be clear, it’s not that we’re opposed to romance. We coined the term, “It’s not rocket science, it’s romance,” after all. However, we ARE opposed to ignoring the realities of engagement rings under the guise of romance.
The industry doesn’t spend enough time talking realisms—and focusing instead on what the industry has created. So here are three truths no on will tell you about buying an engagement ring.
THE ENGAGEMENT BUSINESS IS MORE ABOUT THE GUY THAN THE GIRL
This is because the girls got it mostly figured out—what she wants. The guy on the other hand is going,
“I have to do what?!” . . . “I have a buy a rock and I have to do what?”
Most times, guys just need permission to follow their gut, validation that their intuition is telling them the right thing—or in some cases, that they’re totally off and how to course-correct. Often, guys think they need to spend more than they really need to. The ring is for the girl, but the support needs to be there for the guy at this often confusing and stressful point in their journey.
NO ONE SHOULD TELL YOU HOW MUCH TO SPEND ON A RING
For years, jewelry did this thing where the rule was the man had to spend three months salary on the ring.
Bridal expert John Profit at Jeffrey’s Jewelers Design Studio thinks this is ridiculous.
“We shouldn’t tell anyone how much money they should spend on anything.”
This is for you to be honest with yourself and figure out. Another way to help figuring out how much to spend on a ring is getting really clear on what the girl wants—going through the process of finding out what she loves. That way you’re not spending than you need to, overcompensating out of fear of getting it wrong.
IT’S A BIG DEAL, AND THERE’S NO LOGIC BEHIND IT
For Profit, when it comes to bridal, it goes back to the hidden truth about how we, as society, mark someone in public that they’re married. This “marking” is loaded with tons of emotion, expectation, judgement, and impact for society, whether we acknowledge it or not.
It’s a big deal that someone is going to wear a symbol of that on themselves every day.
The jewelry has created a weird way about how people in the world are seen. This isn’t so much the girls struggle, as it is the guys. There’s no logic to the bridal business whatsoever. It’s all romance. This means there are no rules on how to do it, besides the ones you create for yourself. Honor the weight of this decision by going through the process of figuring it out for yourself.
Don’t rush the process out of family pressure, or listen to outside voices in the jewelry industry or media. The biggest challenge in the engagement process is listening to your inner voice, because the outer voices get so loud at this moment in time. Your romance, your relationship, your engagement experience, is yours. You have permission to do it your way.